A Swim And A Book: The Pathetic Attempts of Seana Lucy Smith Trying To Stay Calm In A World That Has Something Against Her : Week 6

My weekly diary to record how I’m doing on my Do Less and Stay Calm goals for 2015. A way of keeping myself accountable.

Bondi 2km swim

So how’s the past week been?

High Point – The Ocean Swim

Well, I’m not taking a lot of exercise, but did do the Bondi 2km swim on Sunday, highlight of the week. The kids haven’t seen me do a swim before and it was just wonderful to have them there at the end.  The weather was perfect, but a 2km swim is a big challenge whatever the weather and feels hugely satisfying.

The thing is, I know I can do the swim, am really confident in my ability to complete it which is a real confidence booster and if I could apply that certainty to other areas of my life it would be a good thing.

Anyway, hooray for the wonderful organisation Can Too, who can train anyone to swim in the ocean.

My results

I took 57 mins and 59 seconds and was 693rd out of the 733 finishers.

Very slow, but very enjoyable… was cursing myself for not bringing the waterproof camera!

Low Point – Agitation and Despair

Monday was a big come down… I had those racing heart feelings and panic… got too much on, can’t cope… and my old favourite… everything I do is wrong.

It’s awful to have these racing thoughts, to start to ruminate on negative thoughts when realistically I know they are not true and in fact there’s nothing wrong with life at all.

I Know What’s Upsetting Me

There’s a bit of an internal rift, a wound, a pain… and it’s all about my FIFO husband going away again… just silly, I know that… and I know that he’ll be back working in Sydney when he can this year sometime. There’s nothing I can do about it, and the choices are clearly:

a) Be positive, don’t ruminate, self soothe and be a good mum to the kids and friend to myself, it’ll pass

b) Wallow, feel pathetic, race around to avoid the feelings, dig a pit and jump in

 Clear choices, eh?

Saved By A Book

I’d been recommended this book by my friend Annabel Candy.

the-mindful-way-through-depression

Now, I’m actually not at all depressed (but still using anti-depressants after my awful brush with real anxiety last year) but this book is just what I need.

It’s all about using mindfulness to stay in the moment and connect to the body. I’ve been reading it each night and listened to some of the CD that comes with it last night.

Mind you, I only listened to 10 minutes of the 25 minute body scan section before dropping off… but it’s always good to fight perfectionism.

I bought the book from my fave online retailer Booktopia, it costs $29.99, with the CD.

I often by ebooks these days but I’m enjoying having this real book in my hands. Something to hang onto.

Theoretically, I do know all this mindfulness stuff… but in practice, it’s always useful to have reminders on a daily basis.

What’s keeping you calm this week?

And what’s sending you potty?

Happy hump day

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PS  I’m a wee bit concerned as most posts on this blog are really about giving you useful information, whereas this weekly diary post is all about me and written really for me… but so useful that I must keep it up. Sorry if boring for you, dear reader!

The Pathetic Attempts of Seana Lucy Smith Trying To Stay Calm In A World That Has Something Against Her

Week 1 :  The 2015 Goals List

 Week 2 :  Coming Unstuck

Week 3 :  On Greediness + Neediness

Week 4 :   January Check Up

Week 5 : Teenagers + swearing

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